"Thank you. We know that Mr. Snape was instrumental in bringing down Tom Riddle, AKA Lord Voldemort, which has now fixed all the important problems we had in the Wizarding World. Unfortunately, unlike Harry Potter, he died, and we know that he really wanted an Order of Merlin - First Class. So I suggested creating the First Class - Plus designation. It was so popular, the Wizengamot appointed me Minister of Magic again!"

"Speaking of which, were you surprised that Mr. Snape turned out to be so popular after the Fall of the Only Problem We Had in the Wizarding World?" the host of the show asked Harry.

"It was a bit of a surprise, yes. But you know he was the Bravest Man I Have Ever Known," said the Boy Who Lived Twice. "He couldn't really help being sorted into Slytherin - that's obviously where all the mean teachers and Death Eaters come from. But he was redeemed by his bravery."

"Actually, I thought he was redeemed by the Love of a Good Woman," said the host. "Here to join us is the ghost of Remus Lupin. What do you think?"

"Pleased to be here. I would correct that to say that he was saved by his Love for a Good Woman. Lily Evans was Severus' friend, at least at first, but as we found out from the memories he left for Harry, she was never in love with him. Certainly, Severus was brave. That just means he Could Have Been a Gryffindor. It didn't redeem him."

"That's true," said Harry. "Some people make a big deal about Mum dropping Mr. Snape after he called her the M-word. But you need to understand that up until then, she had kept being his friend even though he was sorted into Slytherin. Except when Dad and his mates almost got him killed by Remus."

"That's right, Harry," said Ghost-Lupin. "Lily Evans was a true friend to Severus. She was always telling James how conceited he was and how he shouldn't just hex Severus for existing. Severus' real problem was hanging around with Death Eaters. True, it's not like he could avoid them, being in Slytherin, but sometimes you have to stand up to all the evil Death Eaters in your House and do the right thing anyway."

"Exactly," said Harry. "He didn't manage to do it while he was at Hogwarts, but he finally did later, which is why he was the Bravest Man I Have Ever Known. I think Dumbledore might even have thought Mr. Snape belonged in Gryffindor, what with that comment about sorting people too soon."

"That's dumb," said Ron. "He funked out on standing up to the Death Eaters in his House. The Hat put him in Slytherin for a reason."

"Right," said Harry. "But Dumbledore is the Greatest Wizard Who Ever Lived. Of course he would say so."

"But ... " said Hermione. "I thought Slytherins only wanted purebloods. Professor, I mean Mr. Snape had a Muggle father. Wouldn't that have made him a target in his own House?"

"You have a point, Hermione," Ghost Lupin said. "But you must remember, even more important than Slytherin being the House of pureblood bigots is that it is the House of Evil. The reason Slytherin is made up of pureblood bigots is because pureblood bigots are evil. Just as they all practice the Dark Arts because they're evil. Severus may have been a literal Half-Blood with a Muggle father who hated him, but the main reason the Hat put him in Slytherin was because he was evil and practiced evil magic."

"There's a difference between 'Dark' and evil magic," Lucius Malfoy, the Mainly But Not Completely Evil Slytherin said. "You do realize that most of the curses and jinxes and hexes that Severus used were in common use by all the Houses at Hogwarts. And still were, even by Harry's day."

"Don't try to snake your way out of this, Slytherin," said Ron. "Dark means any magic used by evil people. And Avada Kedavra."

"All the Unforgivables," corrected Hermione. "Except when the Ministry of Magic allows their use against Death Eaters."

"And except when you've forgotten how to do a Stupefy or an Incarcerous or a Locomotor ..." said Lucius.

"So Harry used a Crucio on Carrow," interrupted Ron. "He was a Death Eater, so it didn't count. What's this Snake doing here anyway?"

"We're showing Unity Among the Houses," Harry said.

"I thought we were showing that Slytherin Isn't Evil," said Hermione. "Otherwise, wouldn't we have Luna and Ernie here to represent Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff?"

"You're close," said Ghost Lupin. "We're showing that not all Slytherins are completely evil. Having Lucius here is a stretch, I admit, but Severus comes closest to actually being a good Slytherin. But that's because wasn't a good Slytherin."

"If that's true, maybe we should get rid of Slytherin House altogether," said Neville, the One Good Gryffindor.

Pandemonium broke loose, and the show ended.